.Wednesday, July 16, 2008 ' 7/16/2008 11:06:00 PM
Y
Your love is all i ever wanted
~REGRETS~
There are still uncertainties as to why i am feeling moody and even "high" in school today. First of all, it may probably due to lack of sleep or din had a really good rest. Someone could be cursing me by having unusual nightmares and for all i know, it could be someone i know. That was random. Even i myself don't understand what i am talking about.
Another reason as to why i don't feel like myself today is because the culture faci is ill and couldn't facilitate our class. I was like OMG, there goes another B in my page. I mean when a replacement or rather "new" faci were to take our class, it feels like the first day of school whereby we have to start introducing ourselves to the her and she was yet to find out more about our standards so on and so forth.
Felt quite ignored during class discussions as everyone seem to be "shooting their arrows" here and there. Without knowing it, one could be speechless all of a sudden when there wasn't any time to counter. I mean we all should respect one another when they sharing their views but don't you think we should give others a chance to voice out? No offence anyway.
But the main reason why i am disturbed is the consequences after yesterday's happenings after school in my previous post. I mean i really din expect such a clarification could lead to a massive affection towards another individual. Yes this has been bugging me all day and i try to recall back my past doings and all the things i have said. In between these small insights i often question myself like what the hell's wrong with me? Why did i do that? Do you think it only benefit you alone?
That's my character. I just want to seek justification and nothing else not fully considering the side effects on such an approach. Call me hot-headed and selfish if you wish as i totally deserve to be labelled as that. My mum always tell me to put yourself in other peeps' shoes before you make any decision or in this case "minor confrontation".
Indeed i felt better when i was able to make clear my stand but however there's something attached to my satisfaction which is regrets. I don't which word to describe how i feel. Remorse? Penitence? A mixture of words which best describes wrong doings perhaps?
So many things in my mind right now. So many things to say and repent about. In other words, it's just so complicating when it comes to situations like this. Sorry is so easy to say but difficult to express in terms of actions. I guess things are going to be different from now on not to mention in the near future.
我知道我所说的话不能够代替我所做的事，我不介意你叫我無聊，無知，無能。但是我希望你别把这事情再放在心上。因为我也跟你一样很害怕，害怕你会伤心。
Labels: Regrets after regrets
Empty and lost I put a smile on each day. 7/16/2008 11:06:00 PM.
